Day One of Blogging

I've finally done it!  I've created a blog.  Does that make me one of the cool people?  I sure hope so.  Here I am, nearing 60 (ouch! can't say that number out loud), the most fit that I've ever been, the most detached that I've ever been, the most useless that I've ever been.  So the only way from here is up, yes?  I have no job, no lover, kids grown and gone...a drift on the sea, not sure where to go or why.  I'm pondering the big question:  Why are we here?  Are we just here to fill time? Right now, most days, that's what it feels like.  And I'm able to do that quite well, with nothing really accomplished at the end of the day.  And I'm told "That's ok".  I'm waiting for a sign from the universe as to what's the next step, the next big adventure.  Maybe I'm already on it!  This is a pretty scary trip I'm on, direction unknown.

I've planned some distractions for the next couple of months:  a canoe trip with friends down the Suwannee River in Florida, a bike trip looping across Florida solo, hiking in to Trail Days in Virginia, and hiking rim to rim in the Grand Canyon with friends.  I've even signed up for RAGBRAI (the bike ride across Iowa) but have to wait to see if I get in through the lottery.

So I'm staying busy while I heal.  Heal from a broken heart.  Heal from the transition into retirement.  Heal from the loss of an elderly loved one (106 - can't feel sorry for her!).  Heal from the state of the economy and mood of the country.

I'm not sure why I set up this blogging site.  For one, I've wanted to learn how to do this to use it when I travel (and I'm planning to travel a lot... running away some may call it.... call it what you will, but I'm getting out of town!)  For another, maybe a place to write about aging gracefully... or not!  I'm fighting it every step of the way.  I feel about 49 turning 50, not 59 turning 60.  I think I look it too.  Others may or may not agree.  I workout 3 days a week with weights.  Heavy weights!  And lots of other tough moves like squatting and pushups and jumping and pullups and rowing and throwing.  It's called CrossFit and I love how hard it is.  It gets me out of my head.  And I am the oldest woman in the gym.  And not the slowest!  Go Bag Lady!  Whomp those young things.

I also like to ski (nordic and alpine), hike, backpack, canoe, and bike.  Am I missing anything?  And when I'm not depressed, I like to cook, garden, read, watch movies (I even do that while depressed), decorate my quaint canal home, and spend time with friends.  This last year learning to live all alone has been the pits and I still don't really like it.  I've discovered what a social being I am.  Some alone time is okay, but alone day and night really gets to me.  And I don't have many friends that are comfortable just hanging around informally... the drop-in type.  But I do have one and she's been my life saver!  It probably helps that she lives a couple of blocks away.

So on the topic of aging.  I've been able to fight it off physically, but not mentally.  The number 60 is depressing.  It signals Senior Citizen.  How did this happen?  How did I get this old?  I have a daughter turning 32 this month - she's almost caught up to me!